Does This Ego Make Me Look Fat?

As you might have noticed, you can’t buy an insurance policy for the ego! 

Quite the opposite is true, if you observe life carefully, especially through the wide camera angle that spans over several lives, you will see that the universal, divine teacher is a great leveler and every ego ultimately will be cut down a few sizes. Ouch, it’s not a lot of fun when one is put overnight on a zero calorie ego diet, especially, if you have allowed yourself to pack on the pounds for a few centuries! 

 And trust me, I speak from experience here. And yes, of course the indulgences were a whole lot of fun. Who doesn’t enjoy to boss around an army of servants, be the belle of the ball, be the richest man in the country, make their opponents weak in the knees just thinking of you and your genius brain or save a hundred orphans single handedly out of a burning building?

 Ah yes, these were the good old days when the world was perfectly alright and every cheer and compliment, every medal, every jealous side look glance went straight to the ego’s midsection before it turned into a gigantic triple chin. Yes, that’s right, I made it all about myself and walked around like my S**t doesn’t stink, and felt utterly superior to the average mortals.

 Well, as I said, it was extremely great fun while it lasted. But the karmic wheel has no mercy and it just keeps going ‘round and ‘round and propelled me into a bounty of lives of service and utter humiliation. At first, outraged “don’t they know who I am?” then shocked and stuck in a giant pity-party “poor me, I don’t want to live anymore, give me another whiskey!” to “I am not worthy, I can’t believe how much I messed up” until I ended up in my current predicament “I get it, what do I need to do? Fine, I will cooperate.”

So there we are a few thousand years later. One thing I know for sure, I do not wish to repeat this cycle. Therefore, I keep asking myself: “Does this ego make me look fat?” If I feel the slightest twinge, I voluntarily go on an ego diet instead of waiting for the divine leveler to enforce one.

So, if you have come to the conclusion that your ego is currently a few pounds too heavy, consider an ego diet.

Here are a few tips:

1. Put others first!

2. Let go of ego expectations and count your blessings instead!

3. Commit random acts of kindness and don’t wait for a return!

4. Do charitable act anonymously!

5. Catch yourself in egotistical thinking patterns and reframe them.

6. Hang out with people you consider inferior and figure out what they can teach you.

7. Join a class or do something that is new or hard for you. While doing so, work on finding an attitude of humor, curiosity and surrender.

8. If you tend to make fun of others, learn to make the jokes about yourself.

What you are not funny yet? Well, practice, you are to the rest of the world!

Once you get the hang of the ego diet, it is actually a lot of fun because big egos are pretty cumbersome to navigate around the planet and for enlightenment purposes our ego does have to fit through the eye of a needle.

On that note, I will go back to my diet!!!