The Purpose Behind Really “Crappy” Experiences on Planet Earth!

I like to refer to life on planet earth as spiritual boot camp. Sure, there are a gazillion wonderful and blissful moments that we get to live during our epic journey, but when the going gets tough, boy can it get rough. Just thinking of all the loved ones lost, the plagues, the famines, the wars, the betrayal, the heartbreak, the guilt, the fear to name a few; phew, I get tired just thinking about it. Especially the experiences that our souls label as unforgivable or the ones that come with a loss you feel that you’ll never recover from. The big question her is: how can I reframe my earthly experiences in a way that allows me to heal and to move on?

Let’s look at earth as a school. Each lifetime, souls can sign up for a human avatar (the human body) that gets left behind at the end of each experience.

If you look at the soul reality, all souls end up being OK and we never truly get separated from loved ones. Each personality and character we play is like a role in a movie where the soul actor gets to have certain experiences. At the end of each life it’s a wrap and eventually we get to learn the lessons we came here to learn.

Life on this planet is experienced in a force field of duality. Everything has it’s polar opposite: shadow and light, good and evil, male and female, hot and cold, yin and yang etc. If you took the energetic elevator a few floors up, you’d end up in the realm of divine neutrality, where the polarized energies are harmonized once more.

If as a soul, you have existed and experienced yourself in very light dimensions (other than planet earth), where you have light on light and love on love, there are certain frequencies that you can’t learn and develop. In order to experience and exercise forgiveness, compassion, stamina and unconditional love i.e., we all need the conflict and the shadow as well as things going “wrong” to learn the meaning of these frequencies.

Some souls tend to feel a bit superior to other soul species before they come to planet earth. The human avatar allows us to equalize the playing field to a degree to fully absorb the experiences we sign up for. The amnesia does the rest. We are fully in character, and if we kill someone, we actually believe that they are dead. What really happens is that we kicked them out of their costume, like a character being killed off on Soap Opera. They just start to audition for a new part, the very next week.

We all have killed and been killed in this game numerous times and we have received new avatars for our next assignments. If you are having a hard time letting go of certain events in your soul’s past, remind yourself what the lessons were you wanted to learn. This is another opportunity to learn patience, forgiveness, and compassion on your journey to evolve as a soul. There is nothing that is ultimately unforgivable.

Be open to shine some light into the seemingly dark and “crappy” corners of your soul’s history. Nothing ever happens in vain and with the ability to transmute our own experiences, we become more able to assist others on their path. We can evolve from our gigantic, self-loathing pity-parties to healed, compassionate and wise versions of ourselves. If you are reading this, it might just be your time to take this next step!

Embrace The Mystery, ‘Cause Soul Evolution Isn’t A Linear Process!

How do you view life? Do you think it is a logical process? Do you believe in paradigms that promise you “a+b=c”? Do you hold on to the notion that once you reach the top of the pyramid (pun intended for those of you with a background in Ancient Egypt!) you will get to remain there?

If you answered yes, to any of the above, my question to you is:

“How is that working for you? So, you have been recognized again as the chosen one? Oh, did they return your castle? Well, good for you, if indeed that happened!”

For the rest of us mortals, we have to make peace with the fact that the karmic wheel just keeps going ‘round and ‘round.

For me, this realization came as quite the rude awakening. My calculations weren’t working and my expectations were continuously disappointed. Eventually, it took a while, since I am rather stubborn in nature, I surrendered and humbly made space for the mysteries in life.

In the process, I learned and accepted the fact that the divine plan is a lot more multi-dimensional than our egos would like to believe.

Let me give you a couple of examples:

Imagine a spiritual leader who is meditating twelve hours a day and who treats his followers very well, what do you think his next life would look like?

Maybe, it would be another one of spiritual focus or he might live as a starving actor in New York, or be a baker in a small town in France or a goat farmer in Greece or perhaps a University professor in Moscow. In fact, he may have very high amnesia and not seem very spiritual at all. Now, why would that be?

Perhaps this soul lost touch with the people and felt superior, therefore he is choosing a life that is more rooted in humility and to remember what it feels like to make ends meet. Or, he might be tested on how well he can hold his balance if he doesn’t have the support of a spiritual organization which provides a lot of peace and quiet. So, theoretically any kind of life can flow into a series of new forms, which one wouldn’t expect if you were looking to find a linear process.

Do you expect to find the perfect love under specific conditions?

I.e. You think your karma is good enough, you are attractive, you bring perks to the relationship, you love yourself, you have done your affirmations, you have made space for it and so on and so forth.

Now, look at the world around you. Have you ever seen anyone who doesn’t fit these criteria who has a lot of love in their life? And on the flip side, have you ever seen anyone who fits the profile perfectly and more and who is alone?

Why would that be if life were a logical linear process?

So, let’s apply ourselves as well as we can to the lessons and the experience at hand and then let go and surrender to the mysteries of life.

The Difference Between Judgment And Truthful Observation

Many wonderful people I work with block their intuitive gifts because they are afraid to see something "bad". To them "bad" equals anything that is broke, hurt, shady or energetically compromised in some way. In order to avoid what seems like a negative judgment, they'd rather keep the third eye closed tightly and stay stuck in the mode of light projections (read post on light-and shadow projections).

If this is you, let me reframe your view!

When you break your arm, the x-ray at the doctor's office will show the fracture.

This is a fact, not a judgment. If the doctor told you that you are a horrible, ugly person because your arm is broken that would be a judgment.

The same is true for emotional or energetic circumstances. We are currently in a reality where few souls have realized their full divine potential. Many of us carry ancient battle scars, are trapped in old trauma loops and show behavior patterns motivated by ego and not the heart. The first step to heal is to come up with a truthful diagnosis. Most certainly a truthful read on something that hurts is not a clean bill of health, but rather an item that requires work and healing.

 As the saying goes: The truth will set you free.

So be brave and face what is and rest assured that no matter what you encounter, everything serves an educational purpose for the soul and can be healed, fixed and brought back into alignment.

And of course, we want to refrain from judgment, for no one is bad, horrible or less than because of their injuries.

Turning Pity Into Compassion

How often do you look at fellow humans and feel sorry for them?

In a world filled with suffering, it is easy to pity the ones less fortunate.

"Poor fellow, his wife is sick."

"I feel so bad for them, they lost their home/job/partner/investment."

And how easily do you feel empathy and suffer with someone?

"I always experience other people's pain, if someone next to me has a headache I will get one too."

"I have been so depressed, because my sister is going through a divorce."

"The weight of the whole world rests on my shoulders, I don't see how anybody can have a good time."

These are just a few examples of how we might react to events around us from a place of empathy and pity.

At first glance this appears to be a good-hearted and kind way of responding to other's pain and challenges.

If you look more closely there are a number of reasons why you might wish to reconsider:

1. Souls are here to learn (read post: "Becoming a student of life.") Some of the lessons are painful and a lot of people will feel insulted if you pity them, because you are transmitting the message that you don't think they are strong enough to endure or to overcome their challenges. The bottom line is that they chose their challenges.

Can you respect that? By turning pity into compassion you can choose not to suffer with them, or look at them as a victim of circumstances. Instead you might say:

"I can see that the lesson you are experiencing is painful, you have my compassion, I'll pray for you, I will help if I can and if I am meant to. And I believe that you will be OK."

2. By continuously suffering with the world you are missing out on your own journey.

This is a multi facetted reality where many realities are lived out simultaneously.

If you go back to the school example, they represent nothing more or less than different classrooms. None of the classes are wrong or bad, since everyone in the big picture will graduate. So if you deny yourself love, happiness and/or abundance because you feel guilty to enjoy yourself while others are having a harder time you overlook the fact that:

a) They won't suffer less because you are hurting too, au contraire, they might feel guilty that their situation brought you down. Consider holding the frequency (Read post: Learn to hold the frequency!)

b) You miss out on living your truthful karma, there is a high possibility that you'll end up feeling like you missed out on your own life and possibly grow resentful of people in your environment that had a difficult time.

Compassion is a way to be sensitive and to understand our fellow travelers pain without allowing it to color our own experience of life. Our heart can stay open and loving while setting energetic boundaries and knowing that certain situations are not our responsibility; not because we don't care, but because they are beyond our jurisdiction.

So do yourself and others a favor and turn your pity into compassion.

If you have an issue with pity and empathy there might also be a chance of you being a psychic sponge. I suggest you read the post dedicated to the topic, if you haven't already.

The Importance Of Objectivity

Many of you are blessed with a good intuition. As you might have noticed, it doesn't work as well on self and loved ones. The reason being, we tend to be too attached to the outcome. Our personal/subjective wishes, desires and emotional projections quickly cloud/distort the intuitive message/information as it tries to come through.

I have found that an important aspect for me to continuously work on is the ability to move internally into a more neutral/objective space.

Here are a few tools that have helped me:

1. Pretend it is happening to someone else. How does the situation look to you now?

What would you say to your sister/best friend, if she had just had been yelled at by her boss or told you the story/situation that you are currently involved in.

2. Play screenwriter! Imagine you are the writer of a movie where you are the main character. How do you see the character and what do you want for the character in terms of evolution. Think of alternate endings. I found this one especially helpful, when I have to make big decisions.

3. Remember, you are not your thoughts and nor your emotions. Practicing the observer self on a regular basis during meditation is very helpful. You can learn to pull back the camera from the mayhem raging in your emotional and/or mental body. Think of it like a big camera that you can zoom in and out. This is a muscle we all have; it is just a matter of strengthening it. The stronger it is, the easier it is to access in moments when you most need it.

The key is to practice, practice, practice!

 Until the day you have reached a level of mastery do yourself a favor and admit when you are not able to be objective.

Step back, because chances are high, that your intuition won't work properly.

What Does It Take For You To Pay Attention?

Planet Earth as a school is in some ways like an interactive computer game. If through your actions you are in violation of your karmic contract or on the wrong path, you will get the appropriate negative feedback. These reminders can come in all different shapes and sizes. Sometimes, they come in the form of a friend expressing concern, a bone-chilling nightmare or a little thought that slowly grows into an obsession, continuously tickling your brain. At other times, you will have a gut feeling that you should change your current course or it will lead to disaster. The question is; what does it take for you to listen?

When we don't listen to the gentler nudges, we do provoke the noisier, less pleasant wake-up calls in the form of illness, accidents or big losses in our lives. Some of us have to hit rock bottom in order to change our ways.

I used to be very stubborn and not yield easily, once I had decided on a specific trajectory.

Thirteen years ago, I got myself into some serious trouble and ended up in bed with viral pneumonia for six months. It took me another three years to fully recover my health.

In retrospect, I had to face how many warning signs I had chosen to ignore.

In my stubbornness, I held on to a relationship that I knew wasn't healthy for me. I overstayed for at least four years. During that same time I was going to school, I worked too much, played in a band and allowed my ambitions to run the show, I chose to ignore my physical limitations and any sign of exhaustion.

Well Ego, time to swallow some dust!

These days, I listen to the quiet wake-up calls and am a lot swifter at adjusting my course when necessary.

Discipline and stubbornness can be great allies in reaching certain goals, but be honest with your self, when they are nothing more than glorified ego messenger and executers.

Internally we have a choice to pay attention or to plow ahead.

I have learned that pacing your self oftentimes is the wiser choice when it comes to long-term strategies.

Pay attention and learn to cooperate with the greater flow of the Universe and you might be in for a less bumpy ride.

What Are You Feeding Your Hungry Ghost?

I am borrowing the term 'Hungry Ghost' lightly from the Buddhist Tradition. It refers to the aspect(s) of self that believe/demand to be fed by external circumstances. This is supported by the notion that once you have been provided enough 'food', the hunger will go away. The ghost could go after everything from money, to attention, to fame, to material goods, to education, to love etc.

The problem with these soul aspects is that their hunger can never be fulfilled through an external source and, if entertained, can lead to much distress and dissatisfaction in one's life.

It is crucial to recognize these parts for what they are 'hungry ghosts'.

That is always the first step.

I used to feed mine moves. Geographic moves, that is, believing that if I found just the right location, my life would be that much cooler. I allowed myself 17 moves in 10 years, before I realized that I kept recreating similar circumstances wherever I went.

 I finally turned the camera inward to really create the changes I was after. (I know, can anybody say heavy on the wire, slow study, only took me 10 years to figure that one out!? Well, more reason to work on patience, compassion and forgiveness!)

The second step is to determine what gave birth to the 'ghost'?

Usually soul aspects that can't be satisfied by anything that is happening in the present are suffering from past trauma and are still waiting for a past wrong to be righted, which is impossible, since it already happened. Usually, these aspects feel victimized by what happened to them, which means they need to review the trauma through the student of life lens. (Also read posts 'Becoming A Student Of Life', 'The Only Way Out Is In', 'Practicing For Enlightenment')

It is important to find a way of making peace with the trauma and healing it from the inside. As long as you give your power away to external circumstances, events and people will ultimately fall short in their performance, which can lead to a lot of conflict in relationships.

Also, be aware when you are dealing with the demands of 'hungry ghosts' in your loved ones, because no matter what you do, you won't be able to get it right. I have seen that lead to abusive patterns, which ultimately bring most relationships to their knees.

Saying no to the demands, and opening a dialogue might lead to healing or a break-up, but as Buddha said:

"If you can't find suitable companions for the journey, it is better to travel alone!"

Learn To Hold The Frequency

I find one of the great opportunities in the modern world to spiritually evolve is to practice holding the frequency no matter what.

Look at situations in your life, where you feel that your mood and your well-being depend on your external circumstances. You bounce around like a cork in the ocean with no land in sight.

Do you feel like you could live a more peaceful life, if you lived in nature vs. the city?

Do you think you would be less snappy in your relationships, if the people you are dealing with could just get it right?

Would you be more content, if planet earth wasn't so chaotic?

Might you be willing to forgive, if the other person just apologized first?

The list is endless. Time and time again, we might be caught in a reactive mode, where we are waiting for the outside world to adjust first. Like a chameleon we mimic the frequencies around us instead of staying true to ourselves.

Now imagine what life could be like, if you start holding the frequency no matter what.

A person in your life tries to provoke you; instead of getting angry and engaging in the game, you stay calm and firm, and if necessary walk away undisturbed, because you realize that it really wasn't your issue.

If you reach a state of enlightenment, the noise of the city wouldn't have the power to pull you out of alignment. Once you realize that, you can choose to  take every challenging situation as an opportunity to learn your spiritual lesson.

So instead of giving your power away to the outside, you learn to live from the inside out. Is it always easy to get there? Of course not, otherwise we'd all have graduated a long time ago.

But from my experience it does get easier, and allows for many more moments of peace throughout the day.

Awareness and willingness are important keys to practice and remember you are here, because your soul wanted to learn and evolve. The process isn't always fun, but I can guarantee that in the end it will all have been worthwhile.

Says Who?

When it comes to authority, there are those we blindly give our power to.

The other day, I had a lady at my house for a session. She was utterly distressed about a message she had received from a very famous intuitive. The message didn't resonate with her at all, but considering the source she felt confident that the predicted event would surely take place. This is not the first time this has happened. Many people give their power away to authorities of spiritual, religious, medical or other expertly nature. And that is how we end up following pathways that are not in alignment with our souls.

"I got married and had children, because that is what my parents and peers expected of me. It didn't feel right, but what can you do? I didn't want to be a disappointment."

"One has to drink alcohol at these kind of events. It would look weird if I didn't. I don't want to be ridiculed."

"I have this dream of traveling the world, but my spiritual advisor said no, so I won't go."

There are countless moments when we go against our instincts due to negativity from a source of authority.

My advice is the following:

Listen carefully to any counsel given. See if it resonates for you. If it doesn't, question the source. We are all human and nobody has all the answers. In the end, you have to trust your own intuition and allow it to override any external source.

Remember, this world is a big illusion, things and people aren't always what they appear to be. The 'devil' could appear in any form, and so could an 'angel'. Therefore discernment is absolutely necessary, when navigating the sometimes, treacherous waters of planet earth.